Monday, September 5, 2011

New Perspective Needed

I have hundreds of photos on my phone, waiting to be edited and posted to this blog. I wonder if it will ever happen.

I've dug myself into some deep holes when it comes to the responsibilities I have right now. I am behind in every area of my life. It's odd to because each of these responsibilities are actually activities I enjoy. They are responsibilities I chose. I just got myself in over my head.

Some days I am in denial about everything I have to do. Other days I wake up in the middle of the night and can't fall back asleep because, well, if I'm honest with myself, I'm having a mini panic attack.

If I could just stop being in denial, focus, and make serious headway, I wouldn't have so much anxiety. If I could just remember that everything always somehow works out, I'd be okay.

I have trouble focusing because instead of watching online lectures for school, I want to watch independent shorts on YouTube. Instead of working on my research project, I want to look at knitting patterns on Ravelry. I am so distracted by the beautiful but what I need to be right now instead of the consumer is the creator.

And yes, writing this blog post was just another form of procrastination.

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